Teresa Palmer, Australia
Introduction
Photography by: Gemma Pranita
Were you born and raised in Australia?
Yes! I'm an Aussie through and through. I have such nostalgic memories of growing up in Adelaide, and really want my children to experience the same.
Can you give me a little background on yourself?
I'm a 34-year-old mama of three plus stepmama to my bonus son, Isaac. I’m an actress, producer,entrepreneur and co-founder of blogs (Your Zen Mama and Your Zen Life) as well as a nutritional supplement company, Lovewell. I also have one or two more exciting businesses in the works that I can't wait to share more on soon!
How has being a mother influenced your career?
Being a mother has been the greatest gift in life, both personally and professionally. I think it has influenced my career by forcing me to be selective about what projects I undertake and also consider my family in every decision. Motherhood has shifted so much perspective for me in seeing what really matters and where the magic of life lies... and it's in the little things, those everyday moments. This shift in perspective has propelled me into other arenas outside of my acting work to enable me to set up a life for our family and to be the hands-on mama I get to be.
Through all of your endeavours, you continue to be an incredible source of inspiration, education, and empowerment for other mothers. What is your greatest hope for your pursuits?
Thank you so much for the kind words. I value being real and connecting with other mothers, and I hope that the love, passion, and dedication I pride myself on are reverberated through everything I do. Motherhood is one of my greatest passions in life and if I can continue inspiring, sharing, educating, and learning with other mothers through this passion, it makes my heart full.
What’s the most important thing you’ve learned about the motherhood balancing act, and what advice do you have for mothers attempting to do the same?
Upon reflection, the most important thing I’ve learned along the way is that it's all a juggle and you're never going to get the formula right 100% of the time. The weights will shift from time to time and that's ok, there isn't a perfect balance. It depends on the ebbs and flows of the day/week/month, and as mothers, all we can do is our best. All you can do is show up, as best you can, every day. I'm also such an advocate for mama self-care time, you can't pour from an empty cup!
What’s the biggest challenge when filming as a mother?
I’ve honestly been so fortunate in my career and working with such supportive folk that the challenges have been few and far between. If the projects weren't so family-friendly and understanding it would be a different story but I've been very lucky in having that support to balance the juggle. The hardest thing is the hours and the stamina - we work such long days, but then I want to come home and be a mama too. The downtime isn't ample during filming, but it's a short slog and then the rest of the year I get to be a stay-at-home mama, so it's worth the compromise.
What was your inspiration behind the launch of Your Zen Mama? And what’s your favourite post/content that you’ve shared on the platform so far?
Your Zen Mama was a passion project one of my best friends (Sarah Wright Olsen) and I brought to life to build a community for mamas, papas, and caregivers to feel empowered, inspired, accepted, and supported. We wanted to create a space that was real, for mamas to strip back the curtains and be vulnerable and honest with each other about the good, the bad, and the ugly. We recently focused on pregnancy and infant awareness loss which I was really proud of, and it resonated so well with our community, because it meant we were continuing to move the needle and shine a light on topics that can be considered 'taboo'. Part of that involved my dear friend Annabel, from Miles Apart, who shared very open, real, and raw conversations with Sarah and I about pregnancy loss.
Tell me about your company, Lovewell - what’s been the most exciting aspect?
Lovewell is a wellness company, we make 100% plant-based nutritional supplements offering holistic health and wellness for mamas and little ones. It’s been so exciting building a company from scratch, learning from the trenches, and building a beautiful community. We have some very exciting things in the works!
You have four beautiful children! What are their ages?
Thank you! I have Bodhi Rain who will be seven this coming February. Forest Sage is four, and my little babe Poet Lake who is just 20 months. I’m also lucky enough to be a step mama to my ‘bonus son’ Isaac Love who is 13.
Pregnancy
Can you tell me a little bit about your pregnancies?
Of course, I’ve had three pregnancies so far - hopefully there are a few more to come! I love, love being pregnant. It’s such a special time. I love connecting with baby in the belly, I love the feeling of being pregnant and I love the journey, knowing that it culminates in me meeting my newest little love.
What type of prenatal care did you receive throughout your pregnancy?
The prenatal/birth/postnatal care and support in Australia is second to none - I would choose to birth here every pregnancy without question. I had my first son in the US and my other two children in Australia. In Australia, I was part of the midwifery group practice programme and my beautiful midwife was so supportive throughout, she was a real advocate for me but also honoured the journey I was on and didn't intervene or offload opinions unless she thought necessary. She was always on hand for questions or check-ups and I truly felt so supported.
How did you prepare both physically and psychologically for birth?
I read and re-read Ina May Gaskin's Spiritual Midwifery and Birth Matters. I also listened to a lot of podcasts (Australian Birth Stories and Dr Berlin's Informed Pregnancy podcast). Other than that I just try to connect with my baby throughout pregnancy and remind them we’re on this journey together. I leaned on tools I use in everyday life such as meditation and visualisation and prioritised self-care, movement, and nutrition.
Birth
What have you found the attitudes towards birth to be in Australia?
I’ve been so fortunate in Australia and found the attitude towards birth to be positive, nurturing, safe, and respectful. My two births here have been relaxed, and I’ve felt supported and heard in my feelings, options, and ideal birth. I’ve experienced the most wonderful water births with my midwife Julie Schiller by my side, listening, and honouring my birthing intentions. She trusted my body to do its thing. I cannot recommend the midwifery programme more. I sing its praises from the rooftops!!
Can you share a little about your own birth experiences?
I’ve had three beautiful and very different birth experiences!
Bodhi was born after two days of labour, following pre-ruptured membranes. He was in a posterior position so it wasn’t very comfortable as I had serious back labour. We made it to 10cm dilated and then had to transfer from home to the hospital as my contractions stopped. I ended up pushing Bodhi out 30 minutes after we got to the hospital after being given some pitocin. I then had a retained placenta which had to be manually removed, and because I had a natural birth with no pain relief, that part was verrrrrry uncomfortable. But Bodhi was in my arms, he was healthy, safe, and latched beautifully as soon as he was out. I was one tired mama but blissfully happy.
Forest's birth was the easiest. He was five days over our guess date. My first contractions were at 9am, and I laboured with him largely on my own in the bath and shower. I was expecting a much longer labour so I probably left the house a little bit late - I arrived at the hospital 10cm dilated and started pushing in the hallways! I only just made it into the water tub before he came out. The pushing stage was really easy and fast. I utilised Ina May Gaskin’s techniques of panting breaths and horse lips to breathe him out rather than push. He was out at 12:19pm, so the whole labour was just over 3 hours.
Poet's birth was relatively smooth sailing. It was about four hours total. My midwife Julie broke my waters after I had been in prodromal labour for five days. My placenta was showing a few signs of calcification so we decided I was enough along in the process to have the waters broken. About two hours after she’d broken my waters, active labour kicked in. I laboured surrounded by my best friends Kat, Claire, Cass, and my birth photographer Gemma. My mum was also there and the kids. A room full of my most loved people. I definitely felt supported by my sisterhood. I had a cervical lip at about 9cm dilated which meant concentrating deeply on pushing while my midwife held my cervix back for a few contractions. Poet was born into the water about seven minutes later.
I’m very much looking forward to my next birthing experience!
Did you use a doula to support your birth and is this common in Australia?
I think it's becoming more and more common! I used my childhood friend Kat as my birth doula, it was so beautiful having someone I felt so familiar and comfortable with. I really trust her, she knows me so well and was the perfect person to advocate for me when necessary. In saying that, my beautiful midwife was all of those things too, she guides me on the birthing journey but allows me to lead the way.
Where did you give birth (home/hospital/birthing centre)?
For my first birth we began with a home birth in Los Angeles and then transferred to hospital. My second birth I laboured at home as much as possible and then just made it to the hospital in time and had him in the birth pool at the birthing centre, and for my daughter’s birth we made sure we arrived at the birthing centre with plenty of time to spare and she was also born in the water.
How did you support the physical healing of your body following birth?
I try to nourish my body, resting (as much as possible), eating nutrient-dense foods, lots of baths, and self-care time. The power of connecting with my baby and spending one-on-one time together is also incredibly powerful in healing. Everyone's journey looks different but it's important to do the best you can, not overdo it and ask for support if you need it.
I tore with my first birth so that was a much longer healing process which included peeing into warm buckets of water and using a sitz bath with warm salted water to soothe. Having water births, utilising breathing techniques during pushing, and ensuring my babies were in optimal birthing positions (hello spinningbabies.com) helped ensure I didn’t tear with the second and third births.
What were the most important things in aiding postpartum recovery for you?
I think the most important thing is listening to your body, taking it slow, not pushing yourself and revelling in the precious time with your beautiful newborn. Self-care in the way of baths, sleeping when baby rests, not allowing too many visitors, and adjusting to the new family dynamic is also important.
How did you find the transition to motherhood?
I’ve wanted to be a mum for as long as I can remember! So for me, the transition to motherhood was so exciting and I was more than ready. There were obviously still moments that took me by surprise but I think looking at it through that lens of excitement and fulfilling my dream of having a baby really elevated me - that and the hormones!
Postpartum
What types of support were most beneficial for you during the ‘fourth trimester’?
Family and friends! I felt so supported by my people during the fourth trimester, from both a physical and emotional standpoint. And I have to give a big shoutout to my husband who helped around the house, cooked me nourishing foods, and ensured I was drinking enough water and resting adequately.
Is there any government-funded support after birth for new mothers and/or fathers in Australia? How did this impact your transition to motherhood?
I'm not sure of all the government-funded support offerings in Australia but I really loved the postpartum support by my midwife - she would come to the house regularly to check on me and bubs and it was so comforting to know that offering was there. To continue to bond and share the journey with my midwife was a lovely bonus.
Breastfeeding
Can you share a little bit about your breastfeeding journey?
Yes, of course. I breastfed all three of my children through babyhood and into toddlerhood. I nursed Bodhi through Forest’s pregnancy and then tandem fed them until Bodhi was three and weaned. I then fed Forest through Poet’s pregnancy and tandem fed them until Forest was three and a half. I’m still breastfeeding Poet at almost two and thinking about my next pregnancy. I’m coming up to seven years without stopping!
Do you think breastfeeding in public has been socially accepted in your country?
I think we're definitely seeing traction in this area! Perhaps it's the communities in which I’m a part of in Australia, or my acceptance of it as being completely normal, but I haven't noticed any issues or been hassled by anyone. I think Australia is moving in leaps and bounds with normalising breastfeeding, from the support the media has shown (hello breastfeeding mamas on magazine covers!) to people in a cafe not batting an eye.
Did you turn to anyone for breastfeeding support?
I was fortunate enough to not have any issues with breastfeeding, but in saying that I’d definitely done my due diligence and read up a lot about it prior to having my first, so I did receive support in that respect. My favourite book out there is ‘The womanly art of breastfeeding’ by Diane Wiessinger.
Australia
What’s your favourite thing about being a mother in Australia?
I love the laid-back nature of family life in Australia - the lifestyle, the safety, the neighbourly vibes. I love the community we have around us there.
If the world could learn one thing about how Australia approaches pregnancy, birth, and motherhood, what would it be?
I would have to say the community and the positivity around motherhood and starting a family. Nothing is taboo or off limits, our medical offerings, professionals and birthing centres are second to none, there’s a real community focus for mothers and I feel like the way our medical system is set up, it makes it a seamless journey and transition for mamas from conception to postpartum.
What’s one piece of advice you’d like to give other mothers?
To enjoy the imperfect nature of the parenting journey. To let go of expectations on how the day should go and be willing to honour the present moment without overthinking.